Become A Master Negotiator

This tactic is one of several tactics we recommend you never use. Honest, credible negotiators don’t need to use this tactic. However, there will be times when this tactic will be used against you, so you need to be prepared with the counter.

Summary: Using unpleasant or insulting behavior to intimidate a counterpart.

One of the most challenging counterparts to deal with is a shark. Shark-like behaviors include yelling, screaming, swearing, or fist pounding. The tactics sharks and bullies utilize are usually successful because most people would rather give in and retreat—with their shirts still on their backs—than fight.

Example
A team of union employees is negotiating a contract with management. One of the union representatives starts yelling at the management team whenever he does not appear to be winning a deal point. His behavior intimidates some of the managers, who are tempted to ask their representative to give in rather than having the union member continue making a scene.

Counter

The most effective way to deal with a shark is to get closer to him, not to retreat. If you show that you are not intimidated, his bullying behavior becomes useless.

In the scenario above, management’s representative has four possible counters:

1. He could get up, walk out, and never come back.
2. He could say something like “Most people who negotiate with us do not feel a need to yell, swear, or pound their fists. I wonder why you feel a need to act this way.”
3. If he knows his counterpart to be a bully, before the discussion even starts, he could say, “I have been hoping all week that you will yell and scream like you usually do. Do you promise you will do it today?”
4. Finally, if he is really confident and wants to have a little fun, he could say, “You know, you frustrate a lot of people when you yell and swear, but it kind of excites me. I love people of passion! Will you do it again?”

Using these counters takes confidence, but if you use them well, a bully may yell and swear at others but, most likely, will not yell and swear at you.

Have you used or encountered this tactic in your negotiations? If so, how’d it go?

Summary: Providing the final terms of the negotiation only to change them last minute.

A counterpart might use the Scrambled Eggs tactic to confuse you and your decision-making process. Sometimes facts and figures are used; other times, false information is provided.

Example
A salesman is adding up the cost of some furniture. The buyer says she does not want to spend more than $3,000 for the four pieces she is interested in purchasing. The salesman adds up the prices and says the total comes to only $2,800. But when the paperwork is completed, the salesman claims that he has made a $200 error. Once tax and delivery fees are added in, the total is over $3,000.

In a second example, a person selling a car uses facts and figures, such as Kelley Blue Book prices, to establish the value of his vehicle. He shares the bottom-line figures with a potential buyer, neglecting to point out that the price he is quoting is for a car with lower mileage. His hope is that the buyer won’t ask for proof or a breakdown of figures.

Counter

In the first example, the buyer could expose the furniture salesman’s tactic, saying that she believes the salesman is deliberately trying to deceive her.

In the second example, the car buyer should ask to see the Kelley Blue Book to verify the numbers, and then point out the discrepancy.

In either example, These Boots Are Made for Walking would also be effective.

Have you used or encountered this tactic in your negotiations? If so, how’d it go?

Summary: Asking your counterpart for leniency before making their first offer.

There are times when you want the best available product or service but do not want to pay the price that the top products or services command.

Example
In searching for a certified public accountant, we were given the names of three individuals who were qualified and experienced with our type of business. We interviewed the first two accountants and requested they create a proposal. We scheduled the third accountant for the last interview because two different people who referred this accountant to us said she was one of the best, but, "Very, very expensive.” When we met with the third accountant, we shared the background of how she was referred to us and her associated reputation on price. We ended the meeting by saying, “We would love to work with you but we are not sure if we can afford your fees. Since we are a small business, when you work up the proposal, will you go easy on us?”

Counter

In this situation an effective counter could be the Feel, Felt, and Found. The accountant might have responded, “I can understand that since you have not experienced the high level of service I provide, you might feel my fees are high. Many of my existing clients felt the same way you do until they discovered that the amount I am able to save them is substantial compared to the fees I charge for my services.”

A second tactic that may work well in this situation is to Lose the Battle to Win the War. The accountant may have stated something like, “I will give you a new client discount so that you will quickly see that the value gained by my professional services will make the fees seem inconsequential.”

Have you used or encountered this tactic in your negotiations? If so, how’d it go?

Summary: Letting your counterpart vocalize his desired outcome first.

Often in a negotiation, your counterpart will try to “test the waters” by attempting to have you vocalize your outcome first, giving them the advantage of adjusting their offer and perhaps giving less than they were prepared to.

Example
I was in the market for a new dishwasher. After researching different models and prices, I was ready to buy. During one shopping trip, I approached a salesman and said, “I have been shopping around and I can get a better price on this dishwasher at XYZ. I would like to purchase it here but need to know what the best price is you can give me.” He asked me, “What price did XYZ quote you?” He wanted me to Go First and divulge my bottom line. I stood firm and repeated my question, “What is the absolute best price you can give me?” After a long silence, he finally gave me a price that was well below anyone else’s price. By forcing him to Go First, I’m confident that I got a lower price. Had I gone first, he would have simply matched the price and not beaten it.

Counter

In this case, an effective counter would have been to use the tactic of Calling Your Bluff and ask for documentation. He could have said that he would consider a lower price if I could show him an advertisement or written bid with the lower price on it. Or, he could have utilized the tactic of We’ve Never Done That Before and simply state that it is not their policy to match other competitor’s prices. If he had given me the best price possible to start with, he could simply stand by that price.

Have you used or encountered this tactic in your negotiations? If so, how’d it go?

Summary: Giving up all direct communication with a counterpart. This tactic is reserved for the most difficult counterparts, when all other viable strategies have been exhausted.

Once in a lifetime you are “blessed” with a neighbor or business associate who is truly impossible to deal with. In this rare instance, a special tactic is needed.

Example
For two years, Vic puts up with his neighbor’s complaints about his dog, his kids, his trees, his car, his music, etc. Vic has finally had enough, and when his neighbor starts harassing him again, Vic says, “I give up! I will never communicate with you directly again. My next communication with you will be in the form of a letter from my attorney.”

Counter

The best counter for this nasty neighbor would be to utilize the tactic of Forgive Me, For I Have Sinned in an attempt to reopen the negotiation. Trying to keep the negotiation open would probably be in the nasty neighbor’s best interests, since whenever attorneys get involved in a situation, the attorneys are usually the only ones who come out ahead. A second, more likely, tactic for a nasty neighbor would be Calling Your Bluff. The neighbor would look at Vic and say, “Great, I look forward to getting your attorney’s letter.” Although in this example, the neighbor seems to be the one who has been the bully for two years, when Vic uses You’ve Pushed Me Over the Edge, he becomes the bully. A third possible counter for the nasty neighbor would be to try to get closer to the bully (Vic) by asking, “We have been working out our own problems for over two years. Why do you see a need to get an attorney involved now?”

Have you used or encountered this tactic in your negotiations? If so, how’d it go?

Summary: Getting to know your counterpart to establish a mutual trust.

Although sharks would debate the value of this tactic, being nice and friendly helps build relationships. A counterpart is much more willing to work with you to create a win-win outcome when he likes and trusts you.

Example
You know your negotiation counterpart is an Amiable, so you spend the first five minutes of the negotiation talking about each other’s families. Counterparts who are Drivers and Analyticals must make a conscious effort not to leave out this piece of the negotiation puzzle. Amiables respond better to counterparts who take the time to build some rapport. (Click here to learn more about behavioral styles in negotiation.)

Counter
Some counterparts will go on and on establishing rapport, never getting to the reason they are meeting in the first place. The best tactic to get things back on track is to ask a question to change the direction of the conversation. A counterpart might eventually tell the Amiable, “It sounds like you had a great vacation last week. Now, as far as this week goes, when were you thinking about implementing this new manufacturing accounting system?”

Have you used or encountered this tactic in your negotiations? If so, how’d it go?

Summary: Convincing a counterpart that everyone is doing it.

One of the most powerful ways to sell a customer on the merit of your product is to convince the customer that everyone is using that product. In fact, sales are going so fast you can’t keep it on the shelf. The insinuation is that if your counterpart doesn’t buy in, he will lose out.

Example
If the offer of a free dinner, a weekend’s lodging, or a gift certificate has ever succeeded in luring you to a sales presentation for a timeshare, you know how persuasive the sales team can be. Once you have been captured by your “personal vacation consultant,” you are told how very reasonable this offer is, that you typically spend more on a week’s family vacation than you would on a timeshare, that you can trade the share for another property—and on and on. To raise the excitement level and encourage you to commit, the salesperson tells you that the opportunity for you to buy is very limited. Typically, you are in a room where other couples are also meeting with their “vacation consultants.” Public announcements are made periodically, stating that various properties are no longer available. The pressure builds and it takes extreme courage not to sign on the dotted line.

Counter
The most effective counter is These Boots Are Made for Walking. Depending on your tolerance for pain, you can either walk out and forgo the “freebie” or tough it out to the bitter end and collect your free gift. If, on the other hand, you are really interested in the timeshare, you could counter with the tactic of Good Guy/Bad Guy (with your partner playing the bad guy who wants to nix the deal) to gain some leverage, or use Sweetening the Deal to try to get something extra thrown in the final package. Another effective tactic is I’ll Think About It and Get Back to You Later.

Summary: Increasing penalties if the counterpart does not make a decision.

This tactic, which is similar to No More Mr. Nice Guy, is useful when a counterpart starts making unreasonable demands or causing excessive delays in the negotiation. You start taking punitive action, creating the feeling that your counterpart has One Foot on the Dock and the other foot in the boat—and the boat is slowly moving away from the dock.

Example
The owner of a commercial building decides to refinance her property since interest rates have dropped significantly. She is negotiating with two banks to try to get the most competitive rate. Using the Power of Competition, she keeps gaining concessions from both banks. Pushed to his limits, the loan officer of one bank finally tells the building owner that if she does not sign a letter of intent to lock her loan in at 5.75 percent by Friday at 5:00 pm, the rate will go up to 6.00 percent on Monday at 8:00 am.

Counter

The easiest counter for the building owner would be to utilize These Boots Are Made for Walking, concentrating her negotiations on the other bank she is already working with or opening negotiations with a third bank. A second effective counter would be the Trade-off Concession. She could agree to sign the letter of intent at 5.75 percent if the bank will waive the appraisal fee. Finally, she could employ the Calling Your Bluff tactic, telling the loan officer there is no way she can make a commitment by Friday, so if the bank cannot hold the 5.75 percent interest rate, there is no need to continue the negotiation.

Have you used or encountered this tactic in your negotiations? If so, how’d it go?

Summary: Arranging for a counterpart to visit one’s site or the site of another customer.

Any time you can get your counterpart to leave her office and visit your site or the operation/installation of one of your customers, you obtain leverage. One reason this approach works so beautifully is that it also employs the tactic of Investing Time by getting your counterpart to spend time and energy on the negotiation, which raises her level of commitment. A second reason this tactic is effective is that it gives you the opportunity to show your counterpart how well the item you’re selling works in real life. This enables your counterpart to envision herself using your product or service.

Example

A contractor invites a potential customer out to an office he recently renovated. The customer is happy with what she sees and can picture the changes she wants done in her building.

Counter

To protect herself, the buyer needs to make sure she has the ability to walk away from the other office without feeling obligated to make a decision on the spot. This ability to walk away will help maintain balance in the negotiation. To make sure she has all the facts, the buyer could plan her own Field Trip (possibly to another office renovated by a competitor). The more knowledge she gains about the competition and the contractor’s work, the better off she will be. She might even seek out customers who are dissatisfied with their work. Any information she acquires will help her gain leverage if she decides to continue negotiating with the first contractor.

Have you used or encountered this tactic in your negotiations? If so, how’d it go?

Summary: Outnumbering the opposition.

Showing up to a negotiation unexpectedly and in large numbers can have tremendous impact.

Example

A developer goes before the city council to try to get approval for a project. Much to the developer’s surprise, over 200 citizens show up to oppose the project.

Counter

Advance preparation would have made a counter unnecessary in this situation. If the developer had been well prepared, he would have had some idea of the magnitude of his opposition.

Once The Ambush has taken place, the developer might request a postponement in the negotiation for time to regroup and decide on a new strategy. If the developer doesn’t want to postpone, or fails to obtain a postponement, his next option is to try to sell the decision makers on the benefits of his project. He could talk about the number of people his development would employ and the number of tax dollars the project would generate for the city, as well as express his willingness to work with a citizens’ advisory group made up of some of the people who oppose the project.

Have you used or encountered this tactic in your negotiations? If so, how’d it go?