Become A Master Negotiator

Summary: Asking a counterpart for help.

Mother Teresa was world-renowned for recruiting the help of others to achieve her mission. People found it difficult to refuse Mother Teresa. Why? One reason was that she had an unwavering passion for the causes to which she devoted her time. A second reason was the way she set up a request. She would look a person in the eye with genuine sincerity and state, “I have a problem, and I need your help.”

Looking your counterpart in the eye and saying, “I have a problem, and I need your help,” can be very effective because this tactic touches the part of human nature that wants to be strong and help others. You are asking your counterpart to be as noble and giving as Mother Teresa. Only a very cold person finds it easy to respond, “I can’t help you.”

Example

An employee walks into his boss’s office and admits, “I have some problems and I need your help. I have recently gone through a divorce, my rent has just increased, and my oldest child is now going to college. I really like working for you and this company. Is there anything you can do to help me earn a higher income here so I don’t need to go looking for a higher-paying job?”

Counter

Of course, the manager could simply say “no.” Another option would be to issue the tactic of the Conditional No, stating, “I cannot give you a raise today, but I will consider it in three months when we start the next fiscal year.” Third, utilizing the tactic of There is More Than One Way to Skin a Cat, the manager might suggest, “Although I cannot give you a raise in your current position, we could talk about other positions in the company that pay more money.” Fourth, the manager may want to employ the tactic of, I’ll Think About It and Get Back to You Later to buy some time. No matter which counter the manager chooses, he should empathize with the employee, who is in a difficult situation.

Have you used or encountered this tactic in your negotiations? If so, how’d it go?

Summary: Getting a counterpart to spend time on a negotiation to strengthen her commitment to it.

Getting a counterpart to invest time in a negotiation gives you leverage. The more time people put into any endeavor, the more committed they become to the outcome, even when the outcome is not in their best interests.

Example

I recently bought a TV I had spent about two hours at the store listening to the options and benefits of the various TV’s being sold and was ready to buy. But when the store clerk was entering the sale into the computer, she discovered that the desired model was no longer available. Rather than start all over again, I quickly made a second choice. After two hours, there was no way I was going home without a new TV!

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Summary: Warning that there will be an unpleasant outcome if a satisfactory deal cannot be reached.

The Threat is one of the most pervasive tactics utilized by counterparts who cannot achieve their goals or resolve their differences through normal one-on-one communication.

Example

A manager suspends an employee for one week for insubordination. The employee responds, “You had better think twice about what you are doing to me. When I leave here, I’m going to file a grievance with the union.” Or, “I’m calling my attorney.”

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Summary: Before you make concessions based on what a counterpart tells you, it is good practice to verify anything you are not sure about.

Example

You are purchasing a new refrigerator, and the saleswoman is trying to sell you an extended warranty, since this would mean a nice commission for her. She tells you that the extended warranty would cover all repairs for an additional year. You ask to see the warranty. After reading the section on coverage, you point out that all repairs would be covered only if you paid an additional $150 on top of the $300 extended warranty.

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