Become A Master Negotiator

Summary: Giving up all direct communication with a counterpart. This tactic is reserved for the most difficult counterparts, when all other viable strategies have been exhausted.

Once in a lifetime you are “blessed” with a neighbor or business associate who is truly impossible to deal with. In this rare instance, a special tactic is needed.

Example
For two years, Vic puts up with his neighbor’s complaints about his dog, his kids, his trees, his car, his music, etc. Vic has finally had enough, and when his neighbor starts harassing him again, Vic says, “I give up! I will never communicate with you directly again. My next communication with you will be in the form of a letter from my attorney.”

Counter

The best counter for this nasty neighbor would be to utilize the tactic of Forgive Me, For I Have Sinned in an attempt to reopen the negotiation. Trying to keep the negotiation open would probably be in the nasty neighbor’s best interests, since whenever attorneys get involved in a situation, the attorneys are usually the only ones who come out ahead. A second, more likely, tactic for a nasty neighbor would be Calling Your Bluff. The neighbor would look at Vic and say, “Great, I look forward to getting your attorney’s letter.” Although in this example, the neighbor seems to be the one who has been the bully for two years, when Vic uses You’ve Pushed Me Over the Edge, he becomes the bully. A third possible counter for the nasty neighbor would be to try to get closer to the bully (Vic) by asking, “We have been working out our own problems for over two years. Why do you see a need to get an attorney involved now?”

Have you used or encountered this tactic in your negotiations? If so, how’d it go?

Summary: Getting to know your counterpart to establish a mutual trust.

Although sharks would debate the value of this tactic, being nice and friendly helps build relationships. A counterpart is much more willing to work with you to create a win-win outcome when he likes and trusts you.

Example
You know your negotiation counterpart is an Amiable, so you spend the first five minutes of the negotiation talking about each other’s families. Counterparts who are Drivers and Analyticals must make a conscious effort not to leave out this piece of the negotiation puzzle. Amiables respond better to counterparts who take the time to build some rapport. (Click here to learn more about behavioral styles in negotiation.)

Counter
Some counterparts will go on and on establishing rapport, never getting to the reason they are meeting in the first place. The best tactic to get things back on track is to ask a question to change the direction of the conversation. A counterpart might eventually tell the Amiable, “It sounds like you had a great vacation last week. Now, as far as this week goes, when were you thinking about implementing this new manufacturing accounting system?”

Have you used or encountered this tactic in your negotiations? If so, how’d it go?

Summary: Convincing a counterpart that everyone is doing it.

One of the most powerful ways to sell a customer on the merit of your product is to convince the customer that everyone is using that product. In fact, sales are going so fast you can’t keep it on the shelf. The insinuation is that if your counterpart doesn’t buy in, he will lose out.

Example
If the offer of a free dinner, a weekend’s lodging, or a gift certificate has ever succeeded in luring you to a sales presentation for a timeshare, you know how persuasive the sales team can be. Once you have been captured by your “personal vacation consultant,” you are told how very reasonable this offer is, that you typically spend more on a week’s family vacation than you would on a timeshare, that you can trade the share for another property—and on and on. To raise the excitement level and encourage you to commit, the salesperson tells you that the opportunity for you to buy is very limited. Typically, you are in a room where other couples are also meeting with their “vacation consultants.” Public announcements are made periodically, stating that various properties are no longer available. The pressure builds and it takes extreme courage not to sign on the dotted line.

Counter
The most effective counter is These Boots Are Made for Walking. Depending on your tolerance for pain, you can either walk out and forgo the “freebie” or tough it out to the bitter end and collect your free gift. If, on the other hand, you are really interested in the timeshare, you could counter with the tactic of Good Guy/Bad Guy (with your partner playing the bad guy who wants to nix the deal) to gain some leverage, or use Sweetening the Deal to try to get something extra thrown in the final package. Another effective tactic is I’ll Think About It and Get Back to You Later.

Summary: Increasing penalties if the counterpart does not make a decision.

This tactic, which is similar to No More Mr. Nice Guy, is useful when a counterpart starts making unreasonable demands or causing excessive delays in the negotiation. You start taking punitive action, creating the feeling that your counterpart has One Foot on the Dock and the other foot in the boat—and the boat is slowly moving away from the dock.

Example
The owner of a commercial building decides to refinance her property since interest rates have dropped significantly. She is negotiating with two banks to try to get the most competitive rate. Using the Power of Competition, she keeps gaining concessions from both banks. Pushed to his limits, the loan officer of one bank finally tells the building owner that if she does not sign a letter of intent to lock her loan in at 5.75 percent by Friday at 5:00 pm, the rate will go up to 6.00 percent on Monday at 8:00 am.

Counter

The easiest counter for the building owner would be to utilize These Boots Are Made for Walking, concentrating her negotiations on the other bank she is already working with or opening negotiations with a third bank. A second effective counter would be the Trade-off Concession. She could agree to sign the letter of intent at 5.75 percent if the bank will waive the appraisal fee. Finally, she could employ the Calling Your Bluff tactic, telling the loan officer there is no way she can make a commitment by Friday, so if the bank cannot hold the 5.75 percent interest rate, there is no need to continue the negotiation.

Have you used or encountered this tactic in your negotiations? If so, how’d it go?